Steve is a top performer. A remote work ninja. A Zoom whisperer. But every now and then, Steve mysteriously vanishes. Where does he go? Oh, just out running errands… and that’s become a beloved part of remote work culture.
TL;DR: Steve disappears for “just a bit” during work. And no one minds, because everyone does it. From grocery pickups to walking the dog, remote life is full of little mysteries. And Steve—he just owns it.
Who Is Steve? And Where Did He Go?
Steve is all of us. Or at least, he could be. He’s a friendly, dependable coworker. He shows up to every meeting, nods at all the right times, and hits his deadlines. But every so often…
“Hey, where’s Steve?”
Someone notices the little black square where Steve’s video feed should be. His status? “🟢 Available.” His Slack message? “BRB, quick break!”
Ah yes. Steve is occasionally running errands.
The Code of Remote Work
We’ve all adjusted to work-from-home life. And with it came an unspoken rule:
- Finish your work
- Keep your calendar honest
- Mute when your dog barks
- And be like Steve—disappear once in a while
There’s no badge for “most hours glued to a desk.” There’s only burnout. Steve, the wise man, figured this out early. He knew that “running errands” is today’s form of taking a water cooler break—except sometimes that cooler is in aisle 7 of Target.
What Are These “Errands” Anyway?
Let’s be real. “Errand” is a beautiful, vague term. It can mean almost anything. Here’s a brief guide to what Steve might be doing:
- Grocery shopping
- Dropping off dry cleaning (that hasn’t been dry in weeks)
- Walking the dog who’s been whining since 9 AM
- Getting coffee and absolutely not making it at home
- Sitting in the car in total silence, just… breathing
Honestly, we respect it.
Why We Love Steve for This
There’s a purity to Steve’s tactic. He doesn’t lie. He doesn’t say he’s in a meeting when he’s really at Home Depot. He just… disappears. A short “back in 20” message is all we get. And really, all we need.
It reminds us that flexibility is part of the remote work deal. We traded long commutes for short walks to the fridge. Steve took it a step further—and so can we.
Are We All Secretly Doing It?
Yes. Definitely. Absolutely.
Here are things remote workers have admitted doing “on the clock”:
- Laundry (an actual productive activity!)
- Rearranging furniture
- Going for “focus walks” that last an hour
- Making lunch that somehow involves sautéing and dreams
- Watching just one episode of that show
If you’re nodding right now, you’re either Steve, or Steve-adjacent.
The Zoom Vanishing Act
Steve has tricks. We all do. These are classics:
- The Video-Off Stealth: “I’m having connection issues” (aka, I’m in the self-checkout line)
- The Strategic Slack Status: “Deep work mode” with a skull emoji
- The Scheduled Focus Block: Recurring every afternoon. Unreachable. Totally claimed.
Someone might even say, “Oh, I just missed Steve,” as if he’s Bigfoot. And he kind of is.
What Would Steve Say About All This?
Steve would smile and shrug. Maybe he’d say:
“Work gets done, doesn’t it?”
That’s the key. Steve never uses his errand time as an excuse. He over-communicates when needed. He stays reliable. And when he logs off at the end of the day, he knows he gave it his best—even if that best included a quick trip to the post office.
How to Be a Bit More Like Steve (But Not Disappear Forever)
If you’re feeling stressed or glued to your desk all day, maybe it’s time to take a page out of Steve’s handbook. Here’s how:
- Time block your day. Plan work and breaks.
- Be transparent. A simple “stepping out for 15” is enough.
- Set boundaries. Let yourself be a human, not a hamster.
- Get the work done. That’s the golden rule.
Running errands doesn’t mean slacking. Remote work means working smarter, not longer.
The Magic of a Midday Target Run
Ever been to Target on a Tuesday at 1 PM? It’s quiet, peaceful, serene. It feels like you’ve discovered a secret temple of joy. That’s the Steve life. Not because he’s cheating the system, but because he’s cracked the code.
The truth is, you don’t need to be at your desk 8 straight hours to be highly effective. In fact, your brain needs little resets. Errands help. Fresh air helps. Changing scenery helps. Steve just does what your nervous system is begging for.
It’s Not About Slacking. It’s About Living.
We often mistake “sitting” for “working.” But Steve reminds us: movement, breaks, and errands aren’t the enemy. They’re part of a healthy workflow.
So what if he’s at the pharmacy when you ping? He’ll get back to you. He always does.
A Little Workplace Folklore
“Steve Occasionally Runs Errands” is now almost a myth. A phrase you’d say instead of, “let’s not panic, he’ll be back.” It carries a kind of reverent tone, like:
- “Don’t worry, Steve’s just refueling—he’ll return fresh.”
- “He’s on an adventure to Walgreens. Let him fly.”
- “He’s doing what we all dream of doing.”
Because let’s face it—Steve’s not escaping work. He’s recharging for it. And that, friends, is the remote work way.
Long Story Short…
Steve occasionally runs errands. And he’s become a legend for it.
He taught us that you don’t have to be chained to your workspace to be a superstar. That mental freshness sometimes lives in a grocery aisle, or a drive-thru lane, or even in the pet food section of Costco.
So the next time you need a moment, take one. Put on your shoes, grab your keys, and whisper to yourself:
“I’m going to be like Steve.”